


Silence

by Drarry_Quite_Contrary



Series: Fanatical Fam Discord Writing Challenges [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Abandonment, Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Brotherly Angst, Brotherly Bonding, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), POV Regulus Black, Podfic Welcome, Protective Sirius Black, Regulus Black-centric, Secret Crush, do not post on other sites
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-11
Updated: 2021-01-11
Packaged: 2021-03-15 23:47:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28697190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Drarry_Quite_Contrary/pseuds/Drarry_Quite_Contrary
Summary: Regulus and Sirius were inseparable—or so he had thought. With one word, Sirius was gone, leaving Regulus, so he believed, utterly alone.Written for Fanatical Fics’s New Years Competition 2021WC: Max 1500Character: Member of the OrderObject: FishTheme: New Year, New _____
Relationships: Regulus Black & Sirius Black, Regulus Black/Severus Snape
Series: Fanatical Fam Discord Writing Challenges [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1997635
Comments: 8
Kudos: 48
Collections: Fanatical Fics’s New Year’s Competition 2021





	Silence

**Author's Note:**

> ** *All characters created and owned by J.K. Rowling* **

He had begged, _pleaded_ —it did not matter.

_“Slytherin!”_

A shiver of dread poured down his spine. As the hat lifted off his head, he watched the bright, cheerful smile disappear in an instant, face ashen. Then he’d turned away. Regulus blinked back tears as he joined his fellow Slytherins, ignoring the cheers, the pats on the back. He watched as another first year took his seat. The seat saved for him. But it would never be his to take.

He stared at the back of his brother’s head, stomach in knots. Any moment now, he’d turn around and smile. Any moment now...

  
  


He’d said he’d protect him, that he’d never be alone. It had been a lie. One word and Regulus was as good as dead to him. He wanted to die. Anything to end the throbbing ache in his chest. It only seemed to grow—swallowing him whole. A void that could not be filled.

So Regulus did what all the broken ones do—he lashed out. He started fights, snapped at teachers. Even covered in scrapes and bruises, nothing could hurt more than seeing Sirius’ smiles, hear his laughter. It was as if Regulus had never existed.

  
  


No one dared approach the deranged Regulus Black. Good. He didn’t try to make friends—no one could be trusted. Just another chance to be thrown away like worthless trash. No. Never again. Better to be alone.

Then there was that Snape boy, who he’d never managed to scare off completely. He’d sit with him at mealtimes. To Regulus’ relief, he was a year ahead, so they didn’t have classes together. They never spoke to one another aside from the occasional greeting. It was a comfort really, sharing a space in silence. To be alone—together.

Even when Regulus arrived with bruised cheeks and scraped knuckles, Snape did not say a thing. A few days later, Snape placed a jar of salve on the table, and left without a word. 

Regulus had noticed the older boy was nearly always alone. He wondered if he had any friends. What they were like. What _he_ was like. Not like he cared.

Even after all that time, there was only one person he truly cared about. Someone who didn’t care at all.

* * *

Back home for Christmas break, there was no avoiding him any longer. Two weeks was enough. Regulus would get through to him. He had to. He just had to…

_TAP TAP TAP_

“Siri?”

Silence.

_TAP TAP TAP_

“Sirius, I know you’re in there.” Regulus rattled the handle, locked as expected.

“Go away.”

“I won’t.” Regulus slid to the floor, back against the door. “You have to come out eventually. Two weeks without food? The loo. Imagine that hair without a bath,” he chuckled. When was the last time he had laughed?

A few moments passed, and just as Regulus closed his eyes, the door swung open, slamming his head against the floor.

“Bloody hell!” He rubbed the back of his head, vision blurry. Sirius was standing over him, frowning.

“Get up and get out.” Sirius shoved him with his foot, but not as roughly as Regulus anticipated.

He did not move, just stared up at his brother intently. “We need to talk.” _Please._ He wouldn’t beg. Not yet.

Sirius rolled his eyes, then gestured for Regulus to enter. He clambered to his feet, hissing as his head throbbed, wavering slightly before catching his footing. Regulus stood there awkwardly before moving to sit on Sirius’ bed.

Sirius crossed his arms. “What do you want?”

All the words he’d planned to say, to scream at him, vanished as he looked at his brother. 

“I miss you,” he whimpered. Tears poured down his face.

Nearly four months had passed. They’d never been apart that long. Even during his first year at Hogwarts, Sirius wrote him letters. Even the occasional howler, screaming profanities to their mother’s mortification.

Minutes passed before a hand rested on Regulus’ shoulder, the mattress shifting.

“Reg.”

Regulus jumped to his feet, rounding on Sirius.

“So, I’m in Slytherin! Do you think I wanted it?! I _begged_ to be in Gryffindor...with _you!_ ” collapsing to the floor, sobbing. “I’m still me, Siri. I’m still...me.”

Sirius knelt before him, grabbing his shoulders. “I’m sorry! I’m an idiot, alright! I just...I was scared.”

Regulus looked up. “Scared? Of what?”

“That you’d end up like...them.” Their parents. The Blacks. An endless line of cruel, elitist Slytherins.

“How could you think that? You _know_ me, Siri. Better than anyone. Sorry to be such a _disappointment,”_ he scoffed.

Sirius pulled him into a bone-crushing hug. “No, Reg, I...I was disappointed in myself. I thought I’d failed you. I couldn’t face it...face you. I’m so sorry.”

Regulus’ tears fell to Sirius’ shoulder, soaking his shirt. “I can’t live like this, Siri. I just can’t.”

“You won’t. I’m so sorry, Reg.”

Regulus leaned back, rubbing his eyes. “Promise?”

Sirius smiled, ruffling his brother’s hair. “New year, fresh start?”

Regulus punched Sirius in the arm, who hissed in pain. “Don’t you ever ignore me again, you bastard!”

Sirius glared at him, then broke into a mischievous smile. “Wanna toss some dungbombs into dad’s study?”

Regulus grinned back. “I’ve got a Fanged Frisbee to stick in mum’s knicker drawer.”

“Where’d you get that?”

“Filch’s office.”

Sirius’ eyes widened in shock, “You didn’t.” He looked at his brother with pride. “You sneaky bastard.”

“Learned from the best, didn’t I?” Regulus stood, beaming. “I’ll be right back.” He turned toward the door, but Sirius caught his arm. Regulus’ brow furrowed in question.

“I missed you too.”

  
They’d been sent to their rooms without supper, though Kreacher snuck him the leftovers. Kreacher had always had a soft spot for Regulus. But his brother...he would sooner let him starve. Regulus ate half of the steamed salmon, leaving the rest for Sirius.

When their parents had long gone to bed, Regulus crept quietly down the hall. Sirius’ door was unlocked. 

“Sirius,” he breathed.

A muffled sound came from within. He entered, closing the door softly behind him. “I have some food. It’s a bit cold, though.”

Sirius rubbed his eyes, adjusting to the darkness. “Oh...thanks, Reg.”

Regulus set the plate in Sirius’ lap before lighting a candle. Sirius took a few bites, but soon began pushing it around.

“I’m really sorry it’s not warm. I wouldn’t have been able—“

“It’s fine, Reg,” he said stiffly.

Regulus’ chest tightened. “Siri, what’s wrong?”

“You and Snivellus have been rather chummy.”

“Who?” He didn’t know anyone by that name. Nor did he have any _chums._

“Snape.”

“Oh! Not really, no.” He paused. “Wait. Snivellus?”

Sirius ignored the question. “You’re always with him.”

Regulus let out a laugh before covering his mouth. “Since when?”

“You sit together.”

“Well if you paid any attention you’d know that’s the _only_ time we’re together.”

“I don’t trust him,” he hissed.

“Why?”

“We don’t exactly...get along.”

“So?”

“What if he’s trying to use you...to get back at me?” There was genuine concern in his tone.

“We’ve barely spoken a word to one another. We just sit together. I think he felt sorry for me…” he trailed off. “Maybe I felt sorry for him too.”

“I’d rather you not sit with him anymore.”

“What’s the big deal? It’s not like I can sit with _you._ He’s not bothering me. It would be more awkward to ask him not to.”

“Then just...promise to be careful. He’s not your friend.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” Regulus couldn’t help but feel a tinge of guilt.

* * *

One the first day back at school, Snape took his normal seat beside Regulus. Sirius’ words still spinning in his head, he was acutely aware of his presence.

He turned toward the boy. “Why do you sit by me?”

Snape looked at him, blinking furiously, tinge of pink in his cheeks. “Wha...what?”

“Why. Do. You. Sit. Here? Is it because you hate my brother? Using me to get to him?” He didn’t think it was true, but he had to know.

Snape’s eyes widened. “What, no! Of course, not...how could you think…”

His tone shifted from startled to firm, “What did he tell you?”

“You don’t like him.”

“No.”

“Why, then?” Regulus kept his face blank, though anxiety rippled under his skin.

Snape turned to his plate. He did respond.

“Pity? You feel _sorry_ for me? I’ll have you know—“

“I like you!” he blurted. Snape immediately moved to stand, but Regulus grabbed his wrist.

“Look at me and say it.”

Snape took a deep breath, turning toward him. “I like you.”

Regulus searched his face. No sign of amusement, only sincerity.

“Okay, then.” Regulus released him, turning back to his plate. 

Snape took his seat. After a few silent minutes he whispered, “I missed you.”

All this time, he’d never been alone. Not really. He’d just been too blind to see it.

“Yeah. Me too.”

Maybe being in Slytherin wasn’t so bad after all. 

**Author's Note:**

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